Broken
by Lililedger
Summary: We are sixteen and he is fifteen. And I have never been more confused. But I love them. Bevin, with slight Gwevin and BenxJulie. Kevin-centric.


This was written for a contest over at the Bevin lj community. It was written in 15 minutes, and is not the best I've ever written, but I love it with all of my heart. It is beautiful. It will never be on devart because html hates me.

Disclaimer: Broken is by Seether. Ben 10 belongs to Man Of Action. I don't claim to own either.

_I wanted you to know that  
I love the way you laugh  
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away... _

It's a simple sound. So ridiculously easy. He is ten and I am eleven, and we are running. Wind in our hair, eyes on the sky. My clothes are torn, my hair is greasy, and he _loves _it. So many times, my street-looks have left me lost, and yet… he cannot resist it. I am everything he wants to be. They can't control me like they do him. He'd do anything to be like me. So I will let him. I will be the only one who controls him, and he'll never notice that anyway. He can be mine. I can _own_ him.

I should've known he was too much like me to submit.

__

I keep your photograph and  
I know it serves me well  
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

I am thirteen and drifting through the Null Void. I think I may finally know how to escape, but I cannot face him. I have tried to destroy him for so long, punishing him for what he did to me. Only now do I realize that maybe I'm to blame.

But even if I saw him again, I'd never admit it.

There's a picture we took, running around the city, hunting for fun. I rigged a photo booth. I think I'm happier than I have ever been in that picture. He's looking at me, admiration in his eyes. I am the coolest thing that has ever happened to him.

I still hate him. He still trapped me here.

But slowly, I am regaining control. And when I return to earth, I think I'll leave him be.__

Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome  
And I don't feel right when you're gone away  


I am 14, and I live underground. I lurk where I can, but mostly around _his_ town. I don't know why I don't just leave. I see him everywhere. He never sees me, but one day he might, and then what do I do? I should leave, but I can't bring myself to pack up. I start to look forward to seeing him, even though it makes the blood in my veins _boil._

You've gone away, you don't feel me here, anymore  


And he never stops to think about me.

__

The worst is over now  
And we can breathe again  
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away

I am sixteen, and we are fighting again. Just like old times, though I don't recognize the form he takes. He's changed so much. _I've _changed so much.

And I hate him.

But he offers me friendship again. And I can't walk away from him.

__

There's so much left to learn  
And no one left to fight  
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

I am sixteen and he is fifteen, and even now, I cannot walk away from him. Even after all this time, after all we've been through, I am drawn to him. And I think he knows it.

We travel together, like we did before.

I wait for one of us to betray the other. There is no other way.__

Cause I'm broken when I'm open  
And I don't feel like I am strong enough

I am sixteen and he is fifteen.

And she is sixteen.

And she likes me.

And I guess I like her.

But how either of us can feel this way is something I cannot understand.

And I like her.

But I think _he_ is my best friend.

And, not for the first time, I wonder where this is going.

_Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome  
And I don't feel right when you're gone away_

We are sixteen, and he is fifteen. She has a dance she wants me to go to. I want to go.

But I worry about him. Something is wrong with him. He's not normal lately.

She loves him, but she doesn't watch him. She isn't seeing what I'm seeing. And I'm scared of what that says about me. Scared of exactly what I feel for them both.  
_  
Cause I'm broken when I'm open  
And I don't feel like I am strong enough_

We are sixteen and he is fifteen. And he was pregnant.

The thought makes me hysterical, makes me laugh until tears flow down my cheeks.

But the tears are born from fear, because my first thought was what this new development could mean for _us. _I had to remind myself that it was his alien form that got pregnant. Then I had to remind myself that there _is_ no 'us.'

I danced with her that night. He went off with his own girl.

And we are normal.

__

Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome  
And I don't feel right when you're gone away...

And I am _lying._

_Cause I'm Broken when I'm lonesome  
And I don't feel right when you're gone...  
You gone away, you don't feel me here anymore_

****

'You don't love me, do you?'

We are sixteen, and she has to understand that I _do. _I really do…

**_'But you _want _him.'_**

We are sixteen, and she knows me better than even him, I think.

**_'You don't have to pretend for me.'_**

We are sixteen, and she is the smartest person I have ever met, braver than most girls to be doing this. I have never lied to her. I love her.

_**'You love him, too.'**_

I am sixteen, and I am too young to handle this, and at the same time, to old to forget it.

_**'I love you. Go.'**_

I am sixteen, and he is fifteen.

And she understood.

And he has never smiled like that at anyone but me.

And for the first time in my life…

I feel…

Right.

I am sixteen and he is fifteen.

**_And I love him._**


End file.
